|It Only Hurts When I Laugh
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It Only Hurts When I Laugh
Girls on Steroids
The ambitious coach of a girls track team gives the squad steroids. The teams
performance soars. They win the county and state championship until one day
they are favored to win nationals easily. Penelope, a sixteen year old hurdler
visits her coach and says, "Coach, I have a problem. Hair is starting to
grow on my chest." "What!" the coach says in a panic, "How
far down does it go?" She replies, "All the way down to my balls.
100 lbs of Dynamite
A bodybuilder picks up a woman at a bar and takes her home with him. He takes
off his shirt and the woman says, "What a great chest you have." The
bodybuilder tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite." He takes off
his pants and the woman says, "What massive calves you have." The
bodybuilder tells her, "That's 100 lbs. of dynamite." He then takes
off his underwear and the woman goes running and screaming out of the
apartment. The bodybuilder puts his clothes back on and chases after her. He
finally catches up to her and asks why she ran out of the apartment.The woman
replies, "I was afraid to be around all that dynamite after I saw how
short your fuse was.
Two women were having lunch
together, and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery. The first woman
says, I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob job. The second woman
says Oh that's nothing, I'm thinking of having my asshole bleached! To
which the first replies, Really?, I just can't picture your
husband as a blonde!
Warning - Beer Contains
Yesterday, scientists for Health Canada suggested that men should take
a look at their beer consumption, considering the results of a recent
analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. The
theory is that drinking beer makes men turn into women. To test the
finding, 100 men were fed 6 pints of beer each. It was then observed that
100% of the men gained weight, talked excessively without making sense,
became overly emotional, couldn't drive, failed to think rationally, argued
over nothing, and refused to apologize when wrong. No further testing is
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